So, this is me and my beautiful beautiful girlfriend. She sent our picture last week, but I felt like I should do the same. She tried to tell our story in a few lines, but it’s impossible, so I’ll take my time: I met this girl in a birthday party that I wasn’t even planning to go. I don’t know why, but she started talking to me, she starting shining. Our friendship came from nothing. She lives there, and I live here. She studied there, and I studied here. And we had like just one friend in common, and I wasn’t really in touch with that friend. But as someone already said “They have one big thing in common: they were crazy about each other.” We started talking and talking, and we cared a lot as soon as we know each other. And someday one of us asked “have you ever kissed a girl?” I didn’t, she didn’t, and later that day, she stooled me a kiss. It started with a kiss, just a joking kiss. But then it started to be two kisses. And five kisses. Ten, fifty, one hundred, nine hundred and five, millions of kisses. It started to be more than kisses, and it stopped to be just a joke. It started to be inevitable. I wanted her. It was our secret, like friends with benefits, but “our secret”. She used to say “if you were a boy I would date you”. I knew I would never be a boy, (and believe me: I really wish I was that time) so I assumed I would never have her. “Someday she will meet someone, and the dream is over.” And it was over. She met one, then two, and then three. The first one broke us, it was a chock, but he was a really bad guy and she opened her eyes. But then the second came… And I broke down. She wanted to be with him, and I couldn’t handle it. But then came the third one, and it got worse. I never thought “I love her in a girlfriend way”, so I thought I was just jealous because she’s my baby, my bestfriend, and I don’t want anyone to touch her. And it hurted a lot and she left me as a friend too cause she said “you’re JUST my friend, you shouldn’t feel this way. You HAVE TO handle it. A real friend don’t do this, a real friend accept that I have a boyfriend and shut up”. We never thought we were in love. My heart broke completely. I spent months alone. I stopped eating, sleeping, I stopped seeing everyone. I smoked more than I used to, I smoked weed much more than I used to. And then the second came back and I was shattered. But this time I thought “I don’t love her, so I’ll make an effort to at least can be a simple friend, or something like that.” I cried every night, I cried every day. But I did my best. Every day, I had to prove her that I was healed, so every single day, when they were together in school, I had to stand there, and I had to handle it, cause I knew that she needed me to watch everything to know that I can handle that she loved someone else. I didn’t knew that something could hurt that much. But someday, we talked like we used to when we were the best of friends, and she ended up saying that she was confused, that maybe what we did was more than attraction, that maybe it was real passion, that maybe she have always been in love with me but she wanted to deny it so bad that she had to force herself to have someone else. I swear for god, or for my mother, or for her, or for whoever you want me to swear that I never ever thought I would hear that words coming off her mouth. I pinched myself. I really did. I won the day, I knew she had a boyfriend, and I knew that probably she would stay with him cause probably she wanted to try harder to have a relationship with a boy, but the feeling that for once she thought about choosing me, about loving me, that doesn’t made my day.. that made my life! Some days after that she broke up with him, and told me that nobody had ever made her as happy as I did, and that she was deeply in love with me, and apologized for the fact that she didn’t realized that before and that she had to find out by the worst way for me. I had all the certainties in that second. That was when I started believing that miracles can happen.

I love you baby, and I know that you will study far away from here right now, but I believe in us, and everything will be allright. And hopefully, someday I’ll be able to take you to the altar, and promise in front of everyone to love you forever and ever, baby, ♥

I’m sorry I didn’t realize right away, I’m sorry I made you suffer, and I’m sorry we spended so many months away from each other. I love with all that I am, and you make me the happiest girl alive. You always did. But I was so in denial that I couldn’t handle it :x  I love you, and you’re the one I want to spend my life with. This time in college in different cities is just an effort we have to make so that our babies can have a good life :$  I love you, princess. I will always will ♥